Wikipedia:Don't be high-maintenance

This is an essay. It contains the advice or opinions of one or more Wikipedia contributors. This page is not an encyclopedia article, nor is it one of Wikipedia's policies or guidelines, as it has not been thoroughly vetted by the community. Some essays represent widespread norms; others only represent minority viewpoints.

Shortcuts WP:HIGHMAINT WP:FLOUNCE

This page in a nutshell: Don't threaten to quit, or otherwise make trouble, if you don't get your way. Wikipedia is not about you.

Occasionally, some long-time users come to believe they are more important than other editors, and act in ways to seek regular validation of that belief. Validation is obtained by delivering and obtaining compliance with ultimatums, such as threatening to storm off the project in a huff – a "retirement" or long wikibreak. Other examples including threats to make vexatious claims at noticeboards, or to cease all work in a particular topic area. These dramatics are usually accompanied by a long diatribe about whatever petty issue is driving them away this time.

The writer hopes that this fit of pique will attract a flood of "please don't go" messages, along with plenty of support for their side of the dispute that triggered their round of unreasonable demands. The end result sought is that the "high-maintenance" editing behavior gets the editor exactly what they crave – validation and support – leading to a triumphant return to the project or article, at least until the next petty conflict. Because Wikipedia is not therapy (even if it was, this behavior would be undesirable) or, more importantly, not a soapbox, and most other editors can see through this sort of behavior, such an outcome is unlikely, and becomes decreasingly likely the more times such a door-slamming conniption is attempted, until people hope the editor really quits.

Threats to "leave and never come back" inevitably invite the response: don't let the door hit you on the way out.