Talk:Tali'Zorah

Tali'Zorah has been listed as one of the Video games good articles under the good article criteria. If you can improve it further, please do so. If it no longer meets these criteria, you can reassess it.
Review: October 24, 2013. (Reviewed version).

Tali'Zorah received a peer review by Wikipedia editors, which is now archived. It may contain ideas you can use to improve this article.

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GA Review

This review is transcluded from Talk:Tali'Zorah/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: ProtoDrake (talk · contribs) 09:22, 24 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]

I'll take this one. I hope this helps relieve the GA backlog. Expect something soon. --ProtoDrake (talk) 09:22, 24 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]

First Pass

Okay, I have been over the article. Most of it is alright, but I have enumerated the issues I could find on this pass.

Lead: "..who serves as a party member, or "squadmate", in all three trilogy video games." Reads poorly. Maybe "all three games in the Mass Effect trilogy" would sound better. Later, if a new trilogy appears in which Tali'Zorah is not involved, it can be altered to "original Mass Effect trilogy.

Characteristics: "Tali is very loyal to the fleet, and her voice actor Liz Sroka describes her as willing to sacrifice her life for it." Wrong gender. It's "actress", not "actor".

Creation and Development: "New York City actor Ash ("Liz") Sroka voices Tali throughout the Mass Effect trilogy," same as above, wrong gender.

Appearances: "While on her Pilgrimage, Tali discovers that a rogue Spectre (elite agent of the galaxy's central government[25][26])," I might put the references after the bracket and the comma. It would still reference the information there.

This is only a first pass. Once these issues have been addressed, I will go over the article a second time to check for anything further. --ProtoDrake (talk) 11:35, 24 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]

All of that should be done. Added a comma before "who serves..." since it seemed to run on too long. – Bellum (talk) (contribs) 15:34, 24 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Second Pass

Thanks for the above. Have made a second pass and found only one thing amiss. Once this is addressed, I think the article can be passed.

Reception: Not sure the red link to Citadel should be there. Seem to remember red links can look off-putting. I would either remove the link or link it to the page for Mass Effect 3's downloadable content (until or unless the Citadel DLC gets its own article).

That's it. --ProtoDrake (talk) 15:54, 24 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]

The link's there because I was working on an article for Citadel (it's in my userspace right now, mostly blank). I probably will come back to it one day, but in all honesty with me that could be anywhere from "a few days" to "several months later". I'll remove the link for now, but one day when the stars are shining bright... it can come back, filled with glory.. – Bellum (talk) (contribs)

Understood. I wish you good luck on your article. --ProtoDrake (talk) 16:36, 24 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Verdict

I think now that this article can easily qualify as a GA. Well done. If all your future articles are this well-written and referenced, your presence will be true boon to Wikipedia's Video Game space. --ProtoDrake (talk) 16:36, 24 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]